*Warning: this post may contain triggers for self-harm and material which may be upsetting. Please stay safe and steer clear of this post if you have these triggers.* This week is National Suicide Prevention Week. Given the kind of year I’ve had and my diagnosis of major depressive disorder and my destructive coping mechanism of…
The day after tomorrow. No, not the movie. Just…my surgery is the day after tomorrow. Oh yikes. I can’t believe it’s almost time. I’m probably going to spend every spare minute between now and being knocked out in a mild state of panic. Especially after my appointments this morning.
*May contain triggers for domestic violence* I can’t seem to focus on anything today. Granted, I slept until 4:30 pm because I didn’t go to bed until 5:30 am, so it’s not like I’ve been awake all that long. But there are so many things going through my mind, it’s like a tornado in…
*Warning: May contain triggers for domestic violence * As I alluded to in my last post, hell hath no fury like a group of 1,842 pissed off endo sisters. I am not going to go into tremendous detail for safety reasons, but it looks like the outcome is a good one.
*May contain triggers for domestic violence * I could have gone to bed a few hours ago. I was planning to around 4 am. But then as I was perusing Facebook one last time, I came across a disturbing status in one of the many endo groups I’m a part of. A sister posted…
Numb. Nervous. Yet ecstatic. That’s really what I’m feeling right now. A big wibbly wobbly ball of emotions that I can’t seem to get sorted out.
Not literally. Darkness doesn’t bother me at all. I prefer night time over day time. But of course, it’s almost 4 am and I can’t sleep waiting for this diagnosis. I know what I think, and it’s not good.
If I thought last Friday was a big day, spending all day at the hospital for my various physical exams, blood work, and scans, I would say today actually outweighs it by several metric tons. I mean, I already knew I had a pituitary tumor. The question of course was had it changed in…
Today (or rather, yesterday at this point), was going to be such a good day. I slept well, despite my usual late 4:30 pm wake-up, but I felt good when I woke up and was looking forward to having a good day. Until I read my email. I received an email from my manager…
Here it is, 4:30 am on the last Monday of August. And I cannot sleep for anything. I’ve pretty much been on a night shift sleep schedule for the past month, where I go to bed between 3-5 am and get up anywhere between 2-6 pm. I’m a natural night owl; I take after…
