Friday I had my first post-op follow-up visit after my brain surgery two weeks ago, this one with the ENT surgeon Dr. Sindwani. He scoped my nose and removed what he called “scar bands” that had formed, which he said is fairly common. This caused a bit of a bloody nose, but that’s pretty…
Given that September is almost over and my birthday is at the end of October, I’ve already started to get questions from family members about what I want for my birthday. I hate this question. Not that I don’t like birthdays and receiving gifts. I love books and would love enough blank journals (spiral-bound,…
Although the current time is no longer nocturnal, I was literally up all night and started thinking about maybe writing a blog post in the predawn hours, so I’m going to count it anyway. Yes, I was up all night. And I’m obviously still awake, even though it’s after 10 am. Maybe thinking through…
As I sit here spending my time as a football widow, I can’t help but think about all the goings on of the past year. My journey through infertility, through depression, through pelvic pain, through a brain tumor. I tend to do this every now and then when the calendar comes up on a…
Have you ever been overwhelmed by something after the fact? You go through something, and it’s over, but when it’s afterwards and you really start thinking about it, it becomes overwhelming? In the words of Tony Stark… My life feels like that right now. It’s 3:30 am and I can’t sleep. I’m dead tired…
*Warning: this post may contain triggers for self-harm and material which may be upsetting. Please stay safe and steer clear of this post if you have these triggers.* I had been meaning to post this last Saturday, but that was the day I got discharged from the hospital after my surgery to remove my…
*Warning: this post may contain triggers for self-harm and material which may be upsetting. Please stay safe and steer clear of this post if you have these triggers.* This week is National Suicide Prevention Week. Given the kind of year I’ve had and my diagnosis of major depressive disorder and my destructive coping mechanism of…
*May contain triggers for domestic violence* I can’t seem to focus on anything today. Granted, I slept until 4:30 pm because I didn’t go to bed until 5:30 am, so it’s not like I’ve been awake all that long. But there are so many things going through my mind, it’s like a tornado in…
Numb. Nervous. Yet ecstatic. That’s really what I’m feeling right now. A big wibbly wobbly ball of emotions that I can’t seem to get sorted out.
Not literally. Darkness doesn’t bother me at all. I prefer night time over day time. But of course, it’s almost 4 am and I can’t sleep waiting for this diagnosis. I know what I think, and it’s not good.
