The person I was a year ago is not the person I am now. Not by a long shot. Even though I’m only a year older, I feel as though I’ve aged at least ten years in the past year. Must be a thing that happens once you hit your 30s. When I look…
I don’t understand. I’m out of commission. Again. And to say I’m frustrated is a gross understatement. This fatigue is crushing me into dust. I feel defeated. Worthless. Useless. But most of all, I feel angry.
The time has come. Here it is, October 23, 2016. My last day of a four and a half month long medical leave. 136 days, to be exact. Most of those days were spent in bed. I would be sitting up for the most part, blogging or writing or reading my Bible, but I…
via Daily Prompt: Subdued This is a republish from a month ago…I published it and then it somehow unpublished itself back into my drafts…so here’s a post from the middle of October! I’ve been quite subdued this week. The Google definition of subdued is “quiet and rather reflective or depressed.” I really can’t think…
Why should I feel guilty about something I can’t control? That’s what part of my mind says. But the part that actually controls my feelings completely overrides that. This is in part due to experiences I’ve had that have made me feel guilty, whether the feelings were actually warranted or not. Individuals with chronic…
My health insurance company is going to hate me by the time this year is over. Fingers crossed that this means next year will be a tamer year as far as medical procedures go. Yesterday I had my appointment with Dr. Bain, the neurovascular surgeon my case was referred to at the end of August…
via Daily Prompt: Waiting Sometimes I feel like that’s all I do. Wait. The life of a person with chronic illness is full of waiting.
via Daily Prompt: Trust I have trust issues. With my body and health in particular. But is it any wonder? Considering all the health disasters I’ve had this year, I don’t trust my body as far as I could throw myself. I’ve had enough issues, it’s hard to trust that I’ll ever really be…
It’s 7 am, but still pitch black outside. Such is October. Sunrise isn’t for another half hour. I’m not in the best of moods this morning. While I sort of successfully got my sleep switched over so I’m not awake all night, now I can’t sleep for more than 2-3 hours at a time,…
Some days I amaze myself. And I’m actually able to do a thing. But today I sort of had to, so I’m not sure if it really counts as a thing. And yet, I’m exhausted enough now that I think it does count. Well then.
