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Month: October 2016

Happy Endo-Versary!

Happy Endo-Versary!

Today is my two-year endo-versary! What the heck is that? It’s been two years to the day since I underwent excision surgery at the Center for Endometriosis Care (CEC) in Atlanta, by the awesome Dr. Sinervo! You may be thinking, isn’t it kind of silly to celebrate the anniversary of a surgical procedure? In a word…no. Wouldn’t a patient in heart failure celebrate the anniversary of the day they received a heart transplant? That’s what it’s like for those of us…

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A Cold and Broken Birthday Hallelujah

A Cold and Broken Birthday Hallelujah

The person I was a year ago is not the person I am now. Not by a long shot. Even though I’m only a year older, I feel as though I’ve aged at least ten years in the past year. Must be a thing that happens once you hit your 30s. When I look in the mirror now, I can see the scars that the past year has left on me, both literally and figuratively. I see a person who…

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Relapse

Relapse

I don’t understand. I’m out of commission. Again. And to say I’m frustrated is a gross understatement. This fatigue is crushing me into dust. I feel defeated. Worthless. Useless. But most of all, I feel angry.

The End of an Era

The End of an Era

The time has come. Here it is, October 23, 2016. My last day of a four and a half month long medical leave. 136 days, to be exact. Most of those days were spent in bed. I would be sitting up for the most part, blogging or writing or reading my Bible, but I had to stay in bed because dizziness could come upon me so quickly, I had to be able to lie down immediately if a dizzy spell…

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Subdued

Subdued

via Daily Prompt: Subdued This is a republish from a month ago…I published it and then it somehow unpublished itself back into my drafts…so here’s a post from the middle of October! I’ve been quite subdued this week. The Google definition of subdued is “quiet and rather reflective or depressed.” I really can’t think of a better word to describe my state of being at the moment.

The Guilt of Living with Endometriosis

The Guilt of Living with Endometriosis

Why should I feel guilty about something I can’t control? That’s what part of my mind says. But the part that actually controls my feelings completely overrides that. This is in part due to experiences I’ve had that have made me feel guilty, whether the feelings were actually warranted or not. Individuals with chronic illnesses shouldn’t be made to feel guilty about their conditions. After all, cancer patients aren’t shamed for having cancer, are they? There was nothing they could…

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It’s Not Over

It’s Not Over

My health insurance company is going to hate me by the time this year is over. Fingers crossed that this means next year will be a tamer year as far as medical procedures go. Yesterday I had my appointment with Dr. Bain, the neurovascular surgeon my case was referred to at the end of August when my pre-op imaging revealed a 4-5 mm aneurysm on my internal carotid artery, right next to my pituitary tumor. It was a fantastic appointment; I…

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Trust Also in Me

Trust Also in Me

via Daily Prompt: Trust I have trust issues. With my body and health in particular. But is it any wonder? Considering all the health disasters I’ve had this year, I don’t trust my body as far as I could throw myself. I’ve had enough issues, it’s hard to trust that I’ll ever really be well again. And maybe I won’t. That’s the nature of incurable diseases. But that’s kind of a weird thing, isn’t it? To not trust your body?…

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Nocturnal Musings #16: Now What?

Nocturnal Musings #16: Now What?

It’s 7 am, but still pitch black outside. Such is October. Sunrise isn’t for another half hour. I’m not in the best of moods this morning. While I sort of successfully got my sleep switched over so I’m not awake all night, now I can’t sleep for more than 2-3 hours at a time, so I’m constantly tired. Yesterday I slept from roughly 2-5 am, then 4-7 pm. Tonight (today?) I don’t even really know when I slept. I may…

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