A Step Forward, A Step Back

A Step Forward, A Step Back

I’m practically too tired to write this. The exhaustion of this recovery is unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before.

The last two days have been a little rough. It might have to do with the fact that I exhausted myself by lightly cleaning and putting out my fall decorations on Wednesday. But despite the unseasonably warm weather, the month is half over, so I feel it’s time. It’s weird to see black cat stuff all over my house when it’s 80 degrees outside. And we have to go get our nuclear pumpkins soon! (We call them that because the farmer’s market we get them from is right across from the nuclear power plant and we had a year a few years ago where the uncarved pumpkins did not die until spring…?) I love pumpkins! Pumpkins mean my birthday is soon!

But I digress.

I was unable to make it to my doctors appointments the last two days because I woke up with migraine-like headaches. Getting in a car, even with David driving, was a no-go. It would have been messy. But they were just appointments I had scheduled a long time ago; nothing related to post-op stuff. So I have them rescheduled for winter. Today was especially bad; I wasn’t able to get up until around 4 pm and even then it was a tremendous effort. But I had family visiting and wanted to see them! David’s parents came up because David’s cousin was visiting town from Wisconsin with a friend, so it was great to see them. At least it was a beautiful day for a visit.

I’ve always been impatient with surgical recoveries. The worst was probably recovering from knee surgery three years ago since that was a long process based on the type of repair my surgeon chose due to my age. I pushed myself too hard and had lots of setbacks that resulted in more time off work for some extra PT appointments. I remember sitting on the kitchen floor, with my leg in this huge brace, crying because I wanted to be able to walk normally. It took months for that to happen, but it eventually did.

Now I just need to take one day at a time. Again. It’s rough having two surgeries less than two months apart from each other. At least my recovery from my surgery in July was actually the best recovery I’ve had, despite the issues with my umbilical incision. Maybe because my body had already been through basically the same thing twice before?

But this is entirely different. This was brain surgery. Yes, I’m improving every day, headaches aside. I almost have my full senses of taste and smell back. I was able to smell the outdoors for the first time today! The smell of dirt and grass and the pool. It’s weird when you realize the things you can’t smell and then you can suddenly smell them again. You forget what you’re missing. And I’ve always liked the smell of dirt. (Probably since I used to play in it all the time as a kid, haha.) I can sleep pretty much normally again, on my side and stomach like I usually do. I’m still sleeping with a towel on my pillow though, just to catch any drainage if I sit up to look at the clock or something and can’t grab tissue in time. The cats like it; Molly was practically shoving me off the pillow this morning! We had good snuggle time.

You do what you gotta do…while Nala keeps close by.

I can’t stand the congestion, though. I’ve always been a real weenie when it comes to colds and allergies and sinus infections, which I had all the time as a kid and teenager but haven’t had a problem with in close to four years. I hate the way it makes my head feel, like it’s about to blow off from the pressure in my forehead and like it’s not quite attached to the rest of my body. At least my nasal drainage is much improved, which is nice seeing as how I’ve already gone through an entire box of Puffs Plus Lotion in the past week. Good thing we’re stocked up with plenty of boxes from Sam’s.

That would have been my reaction, too

And now my pain meds are kicking in. Thank goodness. I can’t wait to get off them, for the first time in almost two and a half years. Just Motrin isn’t cutting it yet, but it will eventually, I’m sure. That will be a day to celebrate.

I’m finally fixed (with the exception of that pesky aneurysm that I’m not sure what we’re going to do about yet.) Now I just need to heal. One day at a time.

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