Day 17: How would things be different if you weren’t ill?
Oh boy. Let’s begin dreaming, shall we?
If I didn’t have celiac disease, I’d be able to eat whatever I want. There are so many food I miss that are just hard to do gluten free. Bagels and doughnuts in particular. A Bruegger’s plain bagel with plain cream cheese. Wegman’s creme-filled doughnuts with chocolate frosting. Mmm.
I would be able to go out to any restaurant and not fear getting sick. Then I could attend social gatherings and parties and the like without needing to worry about the food. I wouldn’t be as much of a hermit as I am now! I could eat any food brought into work by my coworkers, especially around the holidays when being a celiac is the most ostracizing.
If I didn’t have endometriosis…wow, think of how different my life could have been. No time lost due to pain. And to think of being free of pain! It’s something that’s hard for me to imagine, because I’m never free of pain, even now. It’s better than it was, but I think the adenomyosis is starting to ramp up based on symptoms I’ve been having since the spring. My angry uterus just keeps getting angrier. And I could have been a mother by now, perhaps.
And yet…there’s a lot of what’s happened to me that I wouldn’t give up for anything. Because of my endo, I have met so many wonderful women (and men) who are bound together by this common diagnosis. I never would have had these new friendships if not for endo. The bond between endo sisters, even ones you’ve never met who live literally on the other side of the world, is a bond that is so strong I almost can’t explain it. We support each other, give each other advice, talk each other off ledges, celebrate with our victories, cry with our disappointments. I don’t think you’ll ever find a group of women with a certain disease state who share more of a bond than women with endometriosis. And that’s a bond I don’t think I want to give up.